James 1:19-20 This you know, my beloved brethren. Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.

What does it mean to be quick to hear?

Are you considered by other people to be a good listener? If not, does this verse inspire you to become one?
What does it mean to be slow to speak?
Do friends think of you as one who weighs his or her words carefully before speaking? Does your family see you as a “slow to speak” person? Is this something you need to work on? How?
In what ways are we to be slow to speak? Why?

Can silence be a barrier in relationships?
In what ways are we NOT to be slow to speak?
What does this tell us about timing?
What does this tell us about taking time to think before speaking?
Have you ever spoken too quickly and put a barrier between yourself and another person?

How are “quick to hear” and “slow to speak” related to one another?

What does it mean to be slow to anger?
Do you know anyone who is easily angered? What actions and words tell you they are easily angered? How do you feel about spending time with this person? Why?
Does anger put a barrier up in relationships? What can bring this barrier down?
What is your first reaction to conflict?
Do friends consider you to be slow to anger? Does your family consider you to be slow to anger? Do you consider yourself to be slow to anger? Is there any inconsistency in these answers? If so, why?
What are the steps to become slow to anger?

How are “slow to speak” and “slow to anger” related to one another?

There is a reason listed in the last section of the scripture for being slow to anger. What is the reason?

Is the righteousness of God something you’d like to achieve?

Why do you suppose the verse begins with “quick to hear”? How does listening first help drive away cutting words and anger?


Cultivating mindful speech and getting rid of quick anger is a life-long process for most if not all. It is very much like being on a diet in which words and angry actions are the food. One can err by eating too little or much too much, the same as one can damage others with withholding words or using cutting words and actions. In a diet, one can simply give up something like sugar or carbs and accomplish something.

Is there ONE thing you’d consider doing or giving up beginning your “diet of words“? Here are a few suggestions if something doesn‘t come to mind at first: withholding kind words or relational information, yelling, cursing, finger pointing, criticism, words that tear down, accusing, belittling, reacting instead of pausing to consider, harsh tone of voice, blaming.

Remember that most “all or nothing” diets fail, and that it is okay to begin again immediately after recognizing failure. Also, consider that having a friend hold you accountable by having them ask you, “How‘s it going on your ‘word and action’ diet?”.

Luke, 24, 35-48
While the disciples were talking, Jesus himself stood among them and said to them, "Peace be with you." They were startled and terrified, and thought that they were seeing a ghost. He said to them, "Why are you frightened, and why do doubts arise in your hearts? Look at my hands and my feet; see that it is I myself. Touch me and see; for a ghost does not have flesh and bones as you see that I have." And when he had said this, he showed them his hands and his feet. While in their joy they were disbelieving and still wondering, he said to them, "Have you anything here to eat?" They gave him a piece of broiled fish, and he took it and ate in their presence.


Why were Jesus' disciples startled, terrified?

Why did they suppose Jesus to be a ghost?

Jesus not only saw their fear, but He also saw inside their hearts. What did He find?

What did He ask them to do to be sure He wasn't a ghost?

What was the disciple's response to Jesus showing His hands and feet?

What is it like to have both joy and disbelieving? Have you ever felt those two things at once?
When? Why?

Why did Jesus request food? Does He ever ask of you a practical assignment to show something of Himself to you?

What does this story tell us about Jesus?

Risen Life

"But Mary was standing outside the tomb weeping; and so, as she wept, she stopped and looked into the tomb; and she saw two angels in white sitting, one at the head and one at the feet, where the body of Jesus had been lying.
And they said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping?" She said to them, " Because they have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid Him." When she had said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, and did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking? " Supposing Him to be the gardener, she said to Him, "Sir, if you have carried Him away, tell me where you have laid Him , and I will take Him away." Jesus said to her, "Mary!" She turned and said to Him in Hebrew, " Rabboni!" (which means teacher). Jesus said to her, "Stop clinging to Me..."
John 20:11-17a

This scripture refers to Mary Magdalene. She is recorded to have been the first to see Jesus after His Resurrection.

1. How much weeping do you suppose Mary had done over the days following Jesus' death? Why more now? What would your feelings have been if a loved one's body was missing from his or her tomb?

2. What did Mary see where Jesus' body had been? What would your response have been to this?

3. Do you suppose Mary knew these people in the tomb were angels? What does her reaction to them indicate?

4. How, after being such a close friend with Jesus, did she not recognize Him? How was He so very different? Is she the only friend who failed to recognize Him at first? What does this tell us about the Risen Life of Jesus? Does this give us any clues for what our own risen life will be like?
5. Who did Mary think Jesus was at first? Why?

6. How did Jesus get her to recognize Him? Consider the Good Shepherd calling His sheep by name. How does this relate to this passage? What relationship does this express between the two? Do you know His voice when He calls your name?

7. What was Mary's response to Jesus? Why do you suppose she called Him teacher?

8. Why does she cling to Him? What would your response have been to seeing Jesus at this moment?

9. What does this scripture tell us about a life stronger than death? Is this life offered to us?

10. Why do you suppose Christ revealed Himself to Mary first?

Specks

Matthew 7
“Do not judge so that you will not be judged. “For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. “Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? “Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye? “You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.

1. In what way might the admonition in vs. 1 and 2 apply to parenting?

2. How is discernment different from judgment?

3. Read vs. 3-5. Now look back at the immediately preceding vs. for a clue as to what “log” needs to be removed from our own eye before working on someone else’s faults.

4. What part of the human body does Jesus speak in these verses?

5. Why do you think Jesus chose the most sensitive and easily damaged part of the body for these verses?

6. When your child approaches you with something in his or her eye, what would be your goal? In what condition would you want to leave the eye itself?

7. When correcting your child, what should be the goal in terms of what in condition you want to leave the child him or herself

8. In what manner would you need to approach your work in order to avoid damaging the eye? What damage might occur if one loses sight of the vulnerability, sensitivity, value, and importance of the eye itself while attempting to remove a speck?

9. Looking at the comparison of the eye, what danger is present when we correct our children if we lose sight of their vulnerability, sensitivity, value, and importance in the process?

10. Why would it be important to be able to see clearly when working on someone’s eye?

11. How would inadequate vision compromise your ability to meet the goal? What dangers might there be in working on someone’s eye if you yourself could not see well?

12. How does a sense of judgment or criticism blind us to the nature of our children’s true needs and to the most effective way to deal with them?

13. How do you respond differently if someone corrects you with love, concern and gentleness than if they correct you with criticism?

14. Think of something that really irritates you about one of your children. Take a moment to lay down any sense of judgment or condemnation for this characteristic. Now picture yourself correcting your child with totally his good in mind without the blinding forces of your own agenda. How does this feel different than correcting with condemnation?

15. Over this next week set aside some time each day to lay down judgment and pick up an attitude of gentleness in preparation for correcting your children throughout the day.

A Beginning

This blog is a project proposed by my friend Claire. We often find ourselves calling one another to examine a scripture in a new way. Yesterday I asked if I could post something Claire had written on my other blog, and she spoke something like this, "Maybe this is something we should do for others." This is my attempt for Claire and I to share Scripture, our thoughts, and our questions with others.